Lakeville woman dares to dream
by Aaron Vehling
Thisweek Newspapers
Doctors kept telling Beth Miller that the problems were with her stomach.
The Lakeville woman thought the symptoms were a typical byproduct of reaching menopause.
The Minnesota Ovarian Cancer Alliance awarded Beth and Bill Miller of Lakeville a trip to Hawaii at the Dream Awards in November. Beth has been battling late stage ovarian cancer for three years. Photo submitted.
The once avid runner was resigned to experiencing intense, comprehensive pain trying simply to get up in the morning. The fiber tablets she was told to take were not helping. Clearly, something was awry.
A visit to the emergency room one day in 2008, on the heels of one of those intensive pain incidents, revealed a more dangerous and stealthier adversary: ovarian cancer.
“They did a CT scan and couldn’t find my ovaries,” Miller said. She was 56 years old and the cancer was in Stage 4, which is the late and potentially fatal stage.
That diagnosis was yet another chapter in a series of hardships that failed to break the Miller family’s spirit. Over the past decade, her husband underwent treatment for melanoma, a heart attack and back injuries, and her father-in-law died.
It all added up to the deferral of a longstanding dream for Miller and her husband, Bill: to experience the tropical paradise of Hawaii.
By late 2009, Miller was in remission, and it seemed the family had enough money for the trip, but then things would happen, such as emergencies, maintenance and life, Miller said.
All that changed this fall.
Deep into rounds of chemotherapy (while serving as president of a company that insures hot air balloons), Miller experienced a beautiful surprise at the hands of her daughter, Jane, and the Minnesota Ovarian Cancer Alliance: a trip for two to Hawaii.
MOCA annually gives out Dream Awards, which are designed to provide cancer sufferers with a respite from the travails of cancerdom. But Miller’s stood out for MOCA Executive Director Kathleen Gavin.
“Her daughter (Jane) actually applied (for the Dream Award) on her behalf, without her parents knowing about it,” Gavin said.
Miller was the last to know about the trip. Her daughter, who lives in St. Louis with family, took some time trying to determine the best way to tell her.
One day, while Miller was at work, Jane emailed her the good news. Miller started crying, unleashing a river of happy tears of relief and disbelief.
“My staff asked me ‘Who died?’ ” Miller said. “I was sitting there blubbering.”
When Miller tried to call her daughter to thank her, she had trouble: She couldn’t stop the cries of relief, the expression that served as a release of years of a dream deferred.
Miller said she and Bill don’t have all their travel details laid out yet, but they’re leaning toward going first to the Big Island and then embarking on a cruise to the other islands.
A stealth affliction
Ovarian cancer is not as prominent in the realm of cancer awareness, but that is not for a lack of effort on the part of MOCA.
The organization is one of the top five donors for ovarian cancer research in the country, giving $300,000 annually, Gavin said. It also offers support groups, committee meetings and does legislative advocacy to raise awareness of the cancer, among other things.
Ovarian cancer manifests a number of symptoms, all of which are often attributed to other diseases, including the following: bloating, abdominal pain, difficulty eating (and sometimes feeling full quickly while eating) and urinary difficulties (such as frequent needs).
Unlike breast cancer, there is no self-examination or mammogram-like test. Unlike cervical cancer, a pap smear can’t suss out ovarian cancer. There are three tests that can help doctors diagnose women: pelvic exams, transvaginal ultrasounds and what’s called a “CA125” blood test.
“If ovarian cancer is expected,” Gavin said, “it is important for women to see a gynecologic oncologist.”
Like Miller, many women are often in later stages of the cancer upon diagnosis, Gavin said. Women ages 55-64 are often associated with ovarian cancer, but it can occur in girls as young as teens, as well as in women in their 20s and 30s.
“(The younger women) have unique issues,” Gavin said. “For many of them, they haven’t found a life partner. They have to deal with dating and discussing the disease.”
They also lose fertility because of an “aggressive surgery” that includes a hysterectomy and six months of chemotherapy.
“Most women will get a remission but then it is a highly recurring disease,” Gavin said. “Once it comes back it’s treated like a chronic disease. There are women who will get a second remission, but it is really the goal of chemotherapy to stabilize the disease and prevent it from progressing.”
Miller still undergoes chemotherapy, though it is not working.
“I’ve not had good results,” she said. “Mine (cancer) has decided to lodge the major tumors in my liver.”
But it is nowhere near the end of the line for Miller.
“I refuse to allow cancer to define my life,” she said. “You do what you have to do. You fight it to the very end.”
Aaron Vehling is at aaron.vehling@ecm-inc.com or www.facebook.com/thisweeklive.
