by Wendy Schadewald
Special to Sun Thisweek
Rating system: (4=Don’t miss, 3=Good, 2=Worth a look, 1=Forget it)
“The Cabin in the Woods” (R) (.5) [Strong bloody horror violence and gore, language, drug use, and some sexuality/nudity.] — Sigourney Weaver directs this exceedingly off, blood-splattered, gory, violent, silly horror film in which five friends (Chris Hemsworth, Fran Kranz, Kristen Connolly, Anna Hutchinson, and Jesse Williams) become blood sacrifices when they are trapped in the woods at a rundown, eerie cabin while blasé, coldhearted administrators (Richard Jenkins, Bradley Whitford, Brian White, Sigourney Weaver, et al.) manipulate their fate in a control room filled with monitors.
“The Kid with a Bike” (NR) (3) [Subtitled] — A compassionate, kind-hearted French hairdresser (Cécile De France) reaches out to a troubled, angry, rebellious, 11-year-old boy (Thomas Doret) who lives at a state-run orphanage in this low-key, down-to-earth, bittersweet, 87-minute, 2011 film after the child learns that his estranged father (Jérémie Renier) wants nothing to do with raising him and begins acting out and endangering himself when he hooks up with a local drug-dealing gang member (Egon Di Mateo) who befriends the youngster.
“Lockout” (PG-13) (2) [Intense sequences of violence and action, and language, including some sexual references.] — When the comely daughter (Maggie Grace) of the president (Peter Hudson) gets trapped onboard an outer space prison station in 2079 after crazed, out-of-control inmates (Vincent Regan, Joseph Gilgun, Tim Plester, et al.) escape from their comatose state, kill the warden, and threaten personnel in this action-packed, predictable, violent sci-fi film, two CIA agents (Peter Stormare and Lennie James) send a skilled, hardnosed prisoner (Guy Pearce) from Washington, D.C., whom they have arrested for murder to rescue the woman.
“Stuck Between Stations” (R) (2) [Language throughout and some drug content.] [DVD only] — When a traumatized, aimless Army soldier (Sam Rosen) returns home from Afghanistan for his father’s funeral in Minneapolis and runs into his high school crush (Zoe Lister-Jones), who recently ended an affair with her married college counselor (Michael Imperioli), at a downtown nightclub in this down-to-earth, low-key, low-budget, 95-minute, 2011 film in the vein of “Before Sunrise” and “Before Sunset,” they spend the night hanging out and running into old high school classmates (Josh Hartnett, Casey Creig, et al.).
“The Three Stooges: The Movie” (PG) (1) [Slapstick action violence, some rude and suggestive humor, including language.] — In this groan-inducing, unfunny, slapstick comedy, three moronic, clumsy, dimwitted friends (Chris Diamantopoulos, Sean Hayes, and Will Sasso) try to raise $830,000 to save an orphanage where they were raised by nuns (Jane Lynch, Jennifer Hudson, Larry David, Kate Upton, et al.) by accepting a lubricious job offer by an adulterous housewife (Sofia Vergara) to kill her husband (Kirby Heyborne) to the delight of her husband’s best friend (Craig Bierko) and father-in-law (Stephen Collins).
Wendy Schadewald is a Burnsville resident.